April 21st 2012 was one of
the worst days of my life, I have never cried so much in my life. On
that day my brother committed suicide, when I heard the news it took
me awhile to process it and when I did all I wanted to do was throw
up. When I think about it today I still get sick. I know he had a
really bad life, it hurts me everyday thinking about that, I haven't
seen him in four years and I was always hoping his life had gotten
better. When we were little we knew we would be separated some day
and we had made a plan that on my 22nd birthday we would
meet up again and find our other brother Jesse. Tony (my brother) was
about 3 years older then me. He was born June 18th 1992.
he decided to end his life by walking on train tracks. At 3am that
Saturday morning a train was coming. Fast. When the men running the
train saw him they whistled the horns continuously but Tony
didn't move. The train then tried to stop, but it was too late. Too
late. I play this scene over and over in my head and never saw it
happen I can just picture it. It makes me cry every time.
I told you this story because teen
depression is a serious issue. People need to know that you can't just
be mean to who ever you want. If you are a bully STOP! You don't know
what their home life is like, they could be getting abused at home like my
brother and at school like him. I was fortunate enough not to have
ever been abused but Tony wasn't. Every time I visited him and my
mother he had new scares and new bruises. If you see some one that
has bruises and scares all over talk to them, make sure they are
okay!
What I went through and am still going
through really sucks and I don't want anyone to have to go through
it. I want to prevent suicide but I need your help! If you some one
that is depressed find some one for them to talk to or be that person
they can talk to. No one should have to be alone. If you are
depressed PLEASE go talk to some one. And I need be talk to me. I am
here for you.
If you know some one that committed
suicide you know how I feel and if you don't. It is something you
should never have to deal with. I feel bad for everyone that has gone
through what I have. I am so thankful that I didn't have to do it
alone. If you need help contact boys town national hot line they
helped through it and so did my friends and family.
Over all please just keep a few things
in mind. If you are bulling some one STOP if you know some who is
depressed GET THEM HELP and if you are depressed TALK TO SOMEONE
there are so many people that care about you and you don't believe
it. I care. So please please just remember this.
Thanks for listening if you have any
questions or comments just post them.
RIP A.R.F. 6/18/92 – 4/21/12
(556 words)
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